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Mock Trades for Every Team

Bill Simmons recently embarked on finding a suitable trade for every single team in the NBA. He only did 27 because he's weak. Let's do one for each team.

Atlanta Hawks
ATL gets: Lou Williams, Marcelo Huertas, and Metta World Peace for some scoring punch off the bench for the playoffs, some point guard depth, and some one to warm the end of the bench
LAL gets: Tiago Splitter's and Thabo Sefolosha's expiring contracts and BKN's 2017 second rounder and Miami's 2017 second rounder. LAL can shed some salary, potentially get even worse, and gain some draft picks if they lose their pick to the 76ers

Boston Celtics
BOS gets Jimmy Butler, Nerlens Noel, and Nik Stauskas for their 1B scorer and some much needed rim protection and rebounding
CHI gets Amir Johnson, Jaylen Brown, and Marcus Smart (sorry, Bill, Smart isn't as good as you really think), the 2017 BKN first round swap, and the 2017 Minnesota second rounder for some young prospects to rebuild with
PHI gets Tyler Zeller and the 2018 BOS first round pick

Brooklyn Nets
BKN gets Andrew Nicholson, Sheldon McClellan, the Wizards 2017 and 2018 second rounders to punt on some salary and get some kind of picks
WAS gets Trevor Booker for a more solid big man rotation

Charlotte Hornets
CHA gets Brook Lopez and Bojan Bogdanovic to fully commit to a slow, half-court offense
BKN gets Nicolas Batum, Frank Kaminsky, and the 2018 Charlotte first round pick for some young prospects

Chicago Bulls
CHI gets Jahlil Okafor
PHI gets Rajon Rondo, Denzel Valentine, and a 2017 Philly second round pick, in the annual let's swap the player we both hate trade

Cleveland Cavaliers
CLE gets Darren Collison and Ben McLemore (under a trade exception) for a backup point for the rest of the season and a wing prospect who's value is so low that they can probably resign him for cheap
SAC gets Iman Shumpert and the 2017 CHA second round pick and the 2019 LAL/MIN second round pick

Dallas Mavericks
DAL gets Eric Bledsoe
PHO gets Andrew Bogut's expiring contract, Devin Harris, and Dallas's 2017 first round pick

Denver Nuggets
DEN get Eric Bledsoe for a point guard upgrade
PHO gets Kenneth Faried and Emmanuel Mudiay and Denver's 2018 first round pick

Detroit Pistons
DET gets Luis Scola and Caris Levert and starts a gruesome tank to grab a point guard in the 2017 draft
BKN gets Reggie Jackson and tries to make the playoffs in 2018 with a Lopez, Jackson, and Lin core

Golden State Warriors
GSW gets Kyle O'Quinn to add some center talent, which probably will make them entirely unstoppable
NYK gets Zaza Pachulia and James Michael McAdoo

Houston Rockets
HOU gets Trevor Booker, Bojan Bogdanovic, and Randy Foye for even more three-point shooters
BKN gets Corey Brewer, Tyler Ennis, and Montrezl Harrell to get some young talent that could turn into rotation players down the line

Indiana Pacers
IND gets Tiago Splitter's expiring contract, Mike Scott's stretchiness, and a 2017 ATL second rounder
ATL gets Monta Ellis to provide some scoring off the bench

L.A. Clippers
LAC gets Carmelo Anthony and Ron Baker
NYK gets Jamal Crawford, Austin Rivers, Brice Johnson, LAC's 2018 second rounder, LAC's 2019 second rounder, and LAC's 2021 first round pick

L.A. Lakers
LAL gets Jason Smith and Trey Burke and WAS's 2017 first round pick, and some second round pick
WAS gets Lou Williams and Thomas Robinson

Memphis Grizzlies
MEM gets Jeremy Lin to address their point guard depth and Justin Hamilton
BKN gets Brandon Wright, Vince Carter, Deyonta Davis, and Troy Williams with MEM's 2017 and 2018 second round picks

Miami Heat
MIA get Joe Harris to shed salary
BKN takes on Josh McRoberts, who can help them win a couple more games

Milwaukee Bucks
MIL gets Andrew Bogut, Deron Williams, Devin Harris, Justin Anderson, Nicolas Brussino, DAL's 2017 first and second rounders so they can put on this season and reload from this loaded draft
DAL gets Greg Monroe, Khris Middleton, and Jason Terry for Dirk's last playoff push

Minnesota Timberwolves
MIN gets Derrick Rose, the price of getting rid of the salary drains that are Rubio and Dieng
NYK gets Ricky Rubio and Gorgui Dieng, a point guard that can just feed Porzingis and a big who can play with Porzingis in spot minutes

New Orleans Pelicans
NOP gets Nick Young and Thomas Robinson
LAL gets Alex Ajinca and Terrence Jones and a 2018 second round pick

New York Knicks
NYK gets Ricky Rubio, Amir Johnson, Marcus Smart, Jaylen Brown, the 2017 BOS second round pick, 2018 BKN first round pick
BOS gets Carmelo Anthony
MIN gets Derrick Rose

Oklahoma City Thunder
OKC gets Jimmy Butler and Rajon Rondo's death contract
CHI gets Enes Kanter, Victor Oladipo, Cameron Payne, and OKC's 2017 first round pick and OKC's 2018 second round pick

Orlando Magic
DAL gets Nikola Vucevic for a center who can play alongside Dirk
OKC get's Bogut's expiring, who will probably get bought out and go play for a contender

Philadelphia 76ers
PHI gets Tyler Zeller and BOS's 2018 first round pick
BOS gets Jahlil Okafor

Phoenix Suns
PHO gets Corey Brewer and K.J. McDaniels
HOU gets Brandon Knight

Portland Trailblazers
POR gets Will Barton, Danilo Gallinari, Emmanuel Mudiay, DEN's 2017 first and second round picks, and DEN's 2019 first round pick
DEN gets Damian Lillard

Sacramento Kings
SAC gets Kyle Singler, Nick Collison, Anthony Morrow, OKC's 2017 and 2019 second round picks
OKC gets Garrett Temple and Darren Collison

San Antonio Spurs
SAS gets T.J. Warren
PHO gets Kyle Anderson, Bryn Forbes, and SAS's 2017 and 2018 second round picks

Toronto Raptors
TOR gets Darren Collison and sheds some long-term salary
SAC gets Cory Joseph, who isn't as great as he's made out to be

Utah Jazz
UTA gets Darren Collison, a viable backup point guard, and Anthony Tolliver, who makes perfect sense next to Gobert as an above-average defending, stretch four
SAC gets Derrick Favors, a player who's still pretty young, and Raul Neto as filler

Washington Wizards
WAS gets Lou Williams and Nick Young
LAL gets Andrew Nicholson, Trey Burke, and Tomas Satoransky along with WAS's 2017 first roud pick and WAS's 2018 second round pick

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